Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Turkey Box

While reading, please keep in mind this occurred months ago. Not during a time that having a turkey box would be normal...if there ever is such a time.

When we began a more aggressive fertility treatment- I was thrilled. I feel great when there is progressive, forward movement. I feel energized, with a purpose and gung-ho on the whole fertility thing. (And yes that is how you spell gung-ho. Wikipedia told me so.) So when I was told I would be doing a shot when the time was right that cycle, I was beyond excited. (And no, not that kind of shot...which does sound way more fun).

I called the specialty pharmacy I was told to and knew I was in the fertility treatment club big time when the phone tree began; "Press 1 for fertility treatment." Wow. This pharmacy primarily delivers specialty drugs for baby-making purposes. Who knew there was such an industry? So I pressed 1 of course and spoke with the nicest customer service individual who prepared my delivery. Actually every time I call I speak with insanely nice people- but I'm sure they get paid a lot to be nice considering one shot costs almost $200. Insane.

They scheduled delivery and informed me it would need to be refrigerated when it arrived, therefor I had it delivered to my office. I planned on refrigerating the shot at work as the package would not be marked "Jennifer Can't Have Babies" so I assumed it would be safe from curious minds.

I waited and waited that day, excited to open my present package. I was walking back from the bathroom when I saw the delivery person leave our office. So I went around the corner to our receptionist and that's when I saw it. Not a small, disguisable, appropriatly sized package for one tiny shot...but this:

I immediately when into crazy, panic, cover my tracks but totally make more of a scene mode and snatched the box from the receptionist. I am pretty sure I said bluntly "This is MINE" and walked away.

I sped walked to my office holding what from any outsider had to look like a turkey box. You know the kind Thanksgiving dinner is delivered in and left on your doorstep in nice insulated packaging so that it stays frozen. I examined the box and decided it must be put in the refrigerator immediately, at work, in the worlds most crowded refrigerator. I carried my turkey box to the kitchen and tried to find room. However, it would not even fit in the shelves, the box was that big.

At this point a rational person would have opened the box, examined the contents and made an educated decision on the best next steps.

Nope. I decided I had to take it home immediately and made up some excuse to leave in the middle of the day. I walked all the way out of my office, passed all my coworkers and boss, went down the elevator, and through the building carrying a turkey box... like a pro (if a pro was trying to act nonchalant but really looked super paranoid).

Once home, I opened the box and found an insulated cooler packed with two ice packs and one tiny little package. Here is a comparison shot of the box and the actual product:

Now, I do believe the packaging is a little dramatic. However, it would have kept the shot cold for a month. Well maybe not a month, but long enough to take it home at a reasonable hour.

I have had multiple deliveries like this now and know exactly what to expect. Plus I am the proud owner of 5 insulated coolers to transport turkeys or a 24 pack, plus 10 new ice packs for my lunch. Hooray!

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